09 November 2006


"Amy: At age 69 you will be attacked by a pack of escaped lap dogs in your neighborhood and never be seen again."

A friend sent a link to a website that has been programmed to predict cause of death. I entered my info and that's the circumstance I'll find myself in when I pass away. Either that or all of the other situations I got when I entered my stats repeatedly. Read on:

Amy: At age 46 you will drown in a wading pool under mysterious circumstances. The only clue will be a small blue pacifier found around your neck. [Mmm, nope]

Amy: At age 66 a statue will fall over and crush you while giving your acceptance speech for the position of Governor.
[I'm not much of a politician, sorry Gov. Schwarzenegger]
Amy: At age 54 while showing your work at a major art gallery, you will be accosted and later slain by PETA activists. [Ironic... I'm a vegetarian and an animal rights activist myself.]
Amy: At age 64 you will be blown up by the pyrotechnics rigged at one of your "Still Not Dead" concerts. [Well, I -am- a bit of a pyro.]
Amy: At age 28 you will go down in a small raft, in your friend's pool, and subsequently drown. [I have a strict policy against using small rafts in pools.]
Amy: At age 28 you will become lost during a road trip and wind up living out the movie "Wrong Turn". Sorry for ya. [Never seen it, never will.]
Amy: At age 71 a group of children will text message you continuously for three years, eventually distracting you while driving and causing a fatal wreck; your fatal wreck. [If I'm still text messaging in 51 years, it's probably my time to go anyway.]
Amy: At age 28 a meteorite will strike you as you are walking to the gas station to buy a 40oz bottle of King Cobra. [I don't drink, nor will I ever, and I deserve that meteorite if that changes.]
Amy: At age 47 you will fall into a tank at a large aquarium and be eaten by suckerfish. [Not likely, 'suckerfish' primarily are scavengers and mostly eat bacteria.]
Amy: At age 40 you will die from a lethal overdose of methamphetamines. ["Drug free's the way to be."]
Amy: At age 67 you will die fighting the Global War on Terrorism in Mexico. [Global War? Terrorism? Mexico? Right.]
So I entered the information one last time and this is the one that seems the most probable:
Amy: At age 61 you will realize that you actually died three years earlier, and have been dreaming all the events since then.

Glamorous, no?


Anonymous said...

Amy: At age 73 you will die lonely and alone.

Heather Feather Weather said...

Wow. Who's anonymous?

dre said...

where is this site?

Amy said...

the link is http://evil.berzerker.net/death_predictions.php
good luck all.